They met online

She’s married to an executive chef at an athletic club. They met online. 

She doesn’t understand what all the fuss is over the Kardashians. They’re only famous because of a sex tape…. and you know what?? She’s decided that O.J. Simpson was definitely guilty. Robin Thicke is so cute but it’s a shame he cheated on his wife because she's so beautiful. She’s half black, which is maybe why it seems like he’s always trying to be black? She’s not sure what she meant by that.

She’s married to a chef. They’re vacationing soon to make up for lost time. They’ve only been married 11 years. They met online.

We click through the images of Bette Midler’s billion dollar apartment in Manhattan and ooh and aah at each sofa and light fixture. 

I ask her if she’s here all day. "Are you kidding?!” She’s got a mani and pedi scheduled at two. She’s out of here at one. She’ll be cabbing back home just as she arrived. When she gets home she’ll be making a tortilla with mozzarella and tomatoes. Another woman and I express jealousy. "Well ladies, it’s not hard!!!!” she reassures us. 

Her husband is a chef and he spoils her with his cooking. They met online. 

Everyone that passes by is a sweetheart and a doll, however, the man in the IT department is none other than a real dick. 

Pardon her language. 

We won't be working together again so as one o’clock hits she says “WELL THIS IS DEPRESSING!!!” We leave and she pulls a yellow post it out of pocket that reads “COFFEE” in large print. 

She’s off to Starbucks.